You may not be looking for love online, but many people are. Tinder says about 40% of couples meet via apps. Whoa.
There are lots of happily-ever-afters, but for some, dating apps are a complete nightmare. Let’s take a look at the dark underbelly of dating apps.
Dating disasters
There are countless stories (Mother Jones paywall link). A 21-year-old named Laura matched with a guy on Bumble and Tinder. She rejected him, he went off the rails, so she researched his phone number. He wasn’t a hot 22-year-old as his profile showed, but a 55-year-old registered sex offender.
A woman in Milwaukee went on a date with a guy she met on Match. She woke up confused the following day, not remembering what happened. Her car was gone, there were $800 in charges on her debit card and she was likely drugged. As if that’s not enough, the man is currently a “person of interest” in a murder case.
Aspiring actor Matthew Herrick was accosted by 1,1000 men, some of whom even broke into his apartment building and showed up at his workplace. He never actually matched with these people. Herrick’s ex created a bunch of fake dating profiles on Grindr using his name and pictures — which was easy since the app didn’t require any verification.
The dirty details
These stories aren’t unique and happen to more people than you’d think. A recent Pew Research survey shows:
- 38% of online daters received an unwanted sexually explicit message.
- 30% continued to receive contact from someone after they told them they weren’t interested.
- 24% were called an offensive name.
- 6% of users experienced a threat of physical harm.
Don’t forget about scammers: 52% of users believe they’ve encountered at least one scam — 63% of men under 50 and 44% of women of any age.
A safe search for love
Looking for love online today comes with a warning, but you don’t have to throw in the towel. Practice these tips to find your new sweetie safely:
- Look for a verified profile badge. Tinder, Bumble, Hinge and OkCupid have them. If they’re verified, they’re not using fake photos.
- Keep an eye out for photos that look overly edited. Try a reverse image search to see if the picture pops up elsewhere.
- Only talk to new matches through the app. If they want to immediately take things to text or another app, that’s a red flag.
- Try to video chat with a match before you meet them in person.
- Steer clear of people who want to meet up immediately or don’t want to meet at all.
- Always meet dates in public and let friends or family know where you are. Take your own transportation so you can bolt if you feel uncomfortable.
💋 Stay safe out there, friends. If you know someone trying to find love, pass this along — not to scare them, but so they can know what to watch for!